Funny Quotes :)

[Jacqui]

For those who are easily amused (like me!)

 

Product warnings:

 

"Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.

"For external use only!" -- On a curling iron

"May irritate eyes." -- On a can of self-defense pepper spray.

"Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." -- On a novelty rock garden set called "Popcorn Rock."

"Warning: May contain small parts." -- On a frisbee.

"Do not use orally." -- On a toilet bowl cleaning brush.

"Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.

"Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted." -- On a sign at a railroad station.

"Warning: do not use if you have prostate problems." -- On a box of Midol PMS relief tablets.

"Do not turn upside down." -- On the bottom of a supermarket dessert box.

"May be harmful if swallowed." -- On a shipment of hammers.

"Fits one head." -- On a hotel-provided shower cap box.

 

Church bulletin mistakes:

 

"This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar."

"Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community."

"Don't let worry kill you -- let the church help."

"This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends."

"The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

 

Kids, on how to tell if two people are married:

 

"Married people usually look happy to talk to other people." -- Eddie, age 6

"You might have to guess based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids." -- Derrick, age 8

 

Forest Service Feedback:

 

"A small deer came into my camp and stole my bag of pickles. Is there a way I can get reimbursed? Please call."

"Instead of a permit system or regulations, the Forest Service needs to reduce worldwide population growth to limit the number of visitors to wilderness."

"Trails need to be wider so people can walk while holding hands."

"Ban walking sticks in wilderness. Hikers that use walking sticks are more likely to chase animals."

"Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid building trails that go uphill."

"The places where trails do not exist are not well marked."

"Too many rocks in the mountains."

 

That's just a few, there are a lot more here:

http://www.rinkworks.com/said/

[amyja89]

[WaterFromTheMoon]

*lol* too funny

[CellyDee87]

Haha I love these "What The!?" kind of statements. At work we sell a baby's bib which has a print saying "Baby's 1st Birthday" in either pink or blue. And in big writing it says on the tag Ages 3+ not to be used for infants WHAT THE?!

[Davey84]

Haha I love these "What The!?" kind of statements. At work we sell a baby's bib which has a print saying "Baby's 1st Birthday" in either pink or blue. And in big writing it says on the tag Ages 3+ not to be used for infants WHAT THE?!

 

well you know those products quotes... it's really funny but also really sad actually that they have to print that, because there are stupid people that DO use that product like that!

[abbie]

hehehehe

[CelineAndRene]

[celinerific]

I also saw one for baby shampoo... "Keep our of reach of children".

[A New Day Has Come]

I love the excuse Letters ones they are so hillirious and funny I love it.

[Ann]

[zoea2812]

[Jacqui]

Yeah, I guess people would have to have done some pretty stupid things for some of those warning lables to be made!

[sgcpc]

too funny! haha